By Damita JQ
I am stunned as I write this blog because two prominent
people have taken their own lives. I wanted
to express some of the myriad of thoughts I have on the matter. For the week of June 4th, 2018, both Fashion Designer
Kate Spade and Chef, Author, and Travel Host Anthony Bourdain took their own
lives. God bless them and their
families. They could not find peace,
despite their wealth, fame, and reported successes.
Spade was worth $200 million at the time of her death,
according to celebritynetworth.com. Bourdain, was worth about $16 million. Both Spade and Bourdain had significant others,
children, and financial means. Avicii (born Tim Bergling), was a 28-year-old Swedish,
Electronic Music Disc Jockey, who traveled the world, and was worth millions. Avicii also took his own life in 2018 as well. In 2014, Comedian Robin Williams committed
suicide.
Suicide is a serious and heartbreaking topic. I wish that Spade, Bourdain, and anyone else
with dark thoughts who took their own lives had reached out to good friends and
to mental health practitioners. I wondered
what made these people so miserable – was it chemical or mental health issues
or just life’s circumstances?
I remember having conversations with people over the
years, who claimed that money would bring them happiness and peace. What the past few years have shown some of us
with our theories on how happy the rich and famous people must be, are that generalizations
on this matter are emphatically wrong. Some
exceptionally successful, wealthy people are also depressed, anxious, and
dissatisfied. Money does not provide
peace or happiness, just as a lack of money does not mean people have no
appreciation of life.
I grew up in a faith-based home without a lot of means,
and I looked at the proverbial cup (of life) as always being half-full, no
matter what I was dealing with at the time. I always had the perspective that things could
get better. Even when down times came in
my life, I never completely lost hope. Life
is a gift. We are born kicking and
screaming to take that first breath, and the battle to survive continues. Some people literally fight to stay
alive. Many in my family fought through
devastating illnesses like cancer to survive.
Some succeeded, and others did not.
I have seen miserable people of all types. I have also seen people making minimum wage,
who work backbreaking jobs, who still talk of having joy in their lives. I recall a male celebrity giving an interview
several years ago, saying he was lonely and had no real friends that he could
call up at 3:00 a.m. for help. I have
seen some people with loving families, money, who still express unhappiness at each
stressor.
The answer to unhappiness is not avoidance, drugs,
alcoholism, or suicide. Seek out help from
professionals. Keep a truth-seeker around
you who can provide you solace and comfort.
Put some time in your life each week to exercise your mind or your body or give yourself a healthy
treat of some type. And know and believe
that any bad period is temporary. I like
the phrase, “and this too shall pass.”
Every human being experiences sadness and depression. It’s all right to feel sadness or loss for a
limited time, but at some point, you must move on. It’s vital to not surrender your existence to
those dark feelings. If you start to
feel lost or depressed over time, seek help.
For more help on suicides, the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration
(SAMHSA) provides the National
Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-SUICIDE or 1-800-273-8255 (TALK).
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